It seems that now more than ever, it’s a challenge to stay focused on your target and keep the momentum going. Lots of people have had banner years, personally and professionally. I’ve heard from many that they’ve had the opportunity to try something they’d never considered and have also learned amazing things about themselves.
Many others have felt blindsided and like they are swimming upstream in uncharted waters.
No matter what’s happening now, I’m sure that you’ve set a goal in the past. Then watched yourself go from excitement to deflation and back again as you moved towards the finish line. That’s the natural flow of things when you’re working on something substantial.
I know for most of my clients, the past year has made it even more difficult to pull themselves out of those dark places where they can’t find any motivation and have no idea where to pull it from.
How do you keep pushing forward and give yourself that boost up when you’re down?
First things first. Give yourself permission to feel whatever you’re feeling about the current situation. It could be frustration or even resignation. Allow yourself to accept whatever emotions come up. Too often, we try to avoid these thoughts or try to talk ourselves out of them. When you relax into the feelings, they will begin to dissolve on their own. Maybe you’ve heard the expression “whatever you resist, persists”?
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Next, you’ll want to tell yourself a different story about what’s happening. That involves learning how to see things from a different angle.
Imagine for a moment sitting in a movie theater. You’re watching yourself, and the scene plays out on the screen. You can see it unroll as you sit in your chair enjoying the show. You are now the observer and can see everything from this vantage point.
Once you’re in this place, ask yourself these 6 questions:
1. Is there something that I can learn from this that will help me in the future?
Trust me when I say that there are no failures. There is always something you can take from any experience to give you a new tool for your toolbox. That’s a win.
2. What is one positive thing about this situation?
When you focus on finding something good, you’ll see things differently. This takes you out from under the weight of the negative feelings and brings clarity.
3. Is there something that I need to let go of?
This may or may not be applied to this situation, but asking the question will help this show-up. You want to get everything possible handled while you’re doing this work.
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4. Can I use this experience to help another person?
I would guess that there is something here that can bring insight or relief to someone else. We often think that we’re the only one going through something, but that’s rarely the case. Focusing outside of yourself also helps you stay objective and get the maximum benefit.
5. Am I allowing this to define my self-worth or value?
Asking this question can be a life game-changer. If you feel like the answer could be yes, give yourself time to see where this leads you. The benefits of this will reach farther than you could ever imagine.
6. What would I tell a friend going through this?
I love giving this homework assignment to my clients. If you want to make it more powerful, sit down, and actually write out a letter to your friend.
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I’m confident that if you take this on, your enthusiasm and passion will return. Remember that life is fluid, and you’ll most likely find yourself here again with your next project. If you work with this tool a couple of times, you’ll be able to shift your mindset by asking just a few of the questions. Eventually, you’ll do it automatically, like firing and exercising a new muscle.
You’re here to make an impact. Be gentle with yourself, and keep on the lookout for more tools.
The light and inspiration will return. I promise.
Looking forward to watching you shine.