For as long as I can remember, I’ve loved to draw, to get outside, and to read. These hobbies have garnered years of creativity and passion, and I can barely imagine life without them. I’ve also gained and exchanged the activities I love to do over the years, and I’ve learned that life is a lot more fluid. Most things don’t function in black or white.
Everyone has hobbies, preferences, and certain tastes in-activity or how to spend their time. For some people, it’s music – they listen to particular genres, play different instruments, follow various artists and learn everything they can about them. Some people like to get outdoors. Whether kayaking, hiking, camping, rock climbing, skiing, or any number of different options, there’s something for almost everyone to enjoy. Reading books, watching TV shows, debating over politics, creating an app, chatting with a friend over coffee, or DIY projects are all of a select few activities that people can do. Hobbies and the things that make us happy are endless.
I believe people are creatures of passion. People are wired to create, to be inspired, to chase the things that bring them joy. But joy can feel elusive at times. Passion coexists on a continuum with apathy, and sometimes it’s the things that we were once passionate about that bring about these feelings of apathy.
So what does a person do if they no longer want to do the things they love?
I think it’s important to first understand why you no longer want to do them. Think about why you don’t love it anymore. Is it something within yourself that’s bringing on feelings of disinterest or lethargy? Is there a personal struggle or an interpersonal relationship issue that needs addressing? Are you externally motivated by certain things, and it’s not a lack of love but a lack of energy or desire to accomplish what you like to do?
Also Read: 9 Things You Should Not Apologize for
People can outgrow the things they love. Preferences change over time, and sometimes the best thing you can do is learn to let go of what used to make you happy to find a new passion. Put your current hobbies on the back burner if the passion is fizzling out. Take some time, discover yourself, and find new adventures to jump into. Maybe you’ll see that you still love your current hobbies; all you needed was a little spontaneity and variety to spice things up.
Sometimes a lack of love means you just need a little TLC. If it’s a matter of motivation, consider your energy levels on a regular basis and see where you’re at. Maybe it’s not that you don’t love your hobbies; they just take more energy than you can spare on that given day. Try a less exhausting activity that you enjoy to help ease any stress you might be dealing with on a daily. Simple pleasures like drinking your favorite tea or coffee can be all the rejuvenation you need.
Similarly, consider how you prefer to do some of the things you love. Do you want to wake up early in the morning, plug in your tunes, and get out to run by yourself? Or would you rather grab your bike and get on the trail with a partner or friend? However, you like to participate in your beloved activities is valid and completely up to you. Also, understand that listening to your preferences makes it easier to find the motivation to take care of yourself and partake in the things you love.
Mental illness is also gaining necessary awareness in our culture today, and for some of us, it can be difficult to muster up passion for the things we love simply because our mental and emotional states are vulnerable. It’s important to realize this is okay and that people can navigate this difficult plane of existence as well as overcome it. Sometimes all we need is to lean on the relationships we have with close friends and family. For others, seeking advice on how to move forward with a counselor is better.
Just recognize that it’s okay to be where you’re at, and give yourself the time to heal and mend. Honestly, whether the things you used to love are something you can never do again, or if you find revived passion for them, both options are great! Whatever happens, it will be the best outcome.
Regardless of the position, you find yourself in, realize that it’s not a death knell for you or your passions. People are complicated creatures, and the world is in a state of constant renewal and change. Sometimes all you need is a little self-reflection and self-care.
- What to do When You Don’t Want to do the Things You Love - February 25, 2021