self-love

Self-love: 11 Steps to Achieve It

Better Life

Have you been drowning in self-pity lately? Are you looking for the courage to stand for yourself and walk with pride? The first thing you need is to practice self-love.

Without learning to love and accept yourself for who you are, you can never be fulfilled. As long as you continue to regret that you are you, you will never unleash your highest potential. Moreover, without self-love, you can never discover the beauty of being you.

If you are struggling to love yourself, hopefully, these steps can help you embrace your existence.

1. Believe that God has created you for a purpose:

The very first thing you need to start loving yourself is realizing that you are not a mistake. You have reached this far because the Creator has a plan for your life. The reason you may be struggling now is probably that you are not where you are meant to be. Therefore, draw close to God and ask Him to lead you to His will for your life.

2. Accept your flaws (self-love means loving everything about you, including these):

Yes, you are not perfect, but no one is. You are probably frustrated because you are not as tall and skinny as a model, you are not a class achiever, or you can’t sing or dance. That’s okay. You are unique and your weaknesses are part of who you are.

3. Discover your strengths:

In connection with number 2, surely there are things that you are good at. Instead of focusing on what you don’t have, start to discover what you have. You probably have beautiful eyes, you may be street-smart, or you are maybe good at cooking! Celebrate your assets and improve them.

4. Step out from where you are not growing:

If your spirit is being dampened by your current environment, like work or a relationship, then think if it’s worthwhile to stay. Don’t settle where you don’t feel valued or you have no opportunity to unleash your potentials. Find an environment where you are respected and valued as a person. Also, it should be where you are free to step up to the better version of yourself.

5. Don’t settle with being an option (‘coz self-love demands being valued as you are):

Always remember that you are as good as anyone else. Never let anyone treat you like a second or third option. In case you feel being treated this way, it is best to talk to the person or people involved about how you feel. If they won’t change, then it would be better to walk away.

6. Choose the field where you can bloom (yes, self-love is finding where you can flourish):

What is your passion? Probably, it is where you are destined to succeed. If you want to have a thriving career and a sense of self-fulfillment, then you need to be planted in the right field. Figure out your skills, talents, and passion. Then, find out how you can make a career out of those.

7. Find ways to upgrade your skills and bankability:

Once you have discovered the career of your dreams, find out how you can level up. You can finish your college degree or even pursue postgraduate studies. In addition, attending workshops and enrolling in training and short courses can improve your skills. As a result, you will have more credibility as an expert in your profession.

8. Don’t compare yourself to others:

Never compare yourself to others. Please remember that you have your own timetable. Therefore, don’t base your success on the pace of how you can achieve what others already have. Please be gentle on yourself by celebrating every small progress you make.

9. Take care of yourself—inside and out:

Self-love involves taking care of yourself physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. Pamper yourself to stay healthy. Being well-groomed, in all aspects, can make you more confident and less insecure.

10. Don’t depend on others for happiness:

Being dependent on others for emotional security is not healthy. It would make you a people-pleaser rather than being true to yourself. Moreover, remember that you cannot make everyone like you. If you are not prepared for this reality, you’d get hurt over and over because of inevitable rejections.

11. Take your past as a lesson and inspiration:

Instead of regrets and blaming yourself for past failures, use them to be stronger. Learn from your past mistakes. Also, make your previous downfalls as a motivation to work harder to reach your goals and come out better.

Self-love makes you complete

You are not a loser—always remember that. Instead of wallowing in self-pity and insecurities, be your no. 1 encourager. Stand for yourself and your dreams, and always be ready to defend and protect yourself from possible harms. Once you have achieved self-love, you’d realize that you don’t need another human to make you whole.

Joan Cyril Abello Hidalgo

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