Does your partner often wreck your words to make you realize that you have done something wrong, but you didn’t? Sounds Alarming for the relationship!
That’s not all done. You also have started giving second thoughts to your own opinions and ideas, but previously there was nothing like that! Well, these are just the beginning of a gaslighting relationship.
Living with a gaslighter is not easy; at the start, their actions might not cause harm, but, over time, their behavior will cause much anxiety and distress for their victims.
What is a Gaslighting Relationship?
Well, Gaslighting is a psychological issue, way common in intimate relationships.
Gaslighting is often practiced by narcissists. Gaslighters want to exercise control or dominance over their partner, convince their significant other that you are the victim and you are the only one who exaggerates things.
Such relationships can become abusive with time. The abuser tries their best to manipulate the Gaslighters, to trust them, to listen to them, but in such a gaslighting relationship, Gaslighters hold much power and authority over the other. They don’t even acknowledge their wrong deeds.
Being gaslighted makes an individual question their reality and often plays with their self-esteem and confidence. Gaslighters are typical attention seekers.
If you are a victim of a gaslighting relationship and looking for quotes to motivate you and bring your confidence. Below is a list of the best-gaslighting quotes and a collection of phrases that help you gain clarity and strength.
Signs of A Gaslighter
- The gaslighting person can question your memory and often blame you for forgetting things. Even if you don’t, they will make you believe that.
- They refuse to engage in a discussion. A gaslighter doesn’t believe in having a conversation about what is going wrong. They tend to run away and beat around the bush.
- They say something or act in an abusive manner, refusing to acknowledge that. They coat the damage with them over smart ideas.
- They are emotionally unavailable. Gaslighters fail to recognize your feelings and never take out time for you. They do not understand what you are going through emotionally.
- They take you for granted. Gaslighters will connect to you at their convenience. If they are in need, they will come to you. Otherwise, they will act cold.
Common Phrases Gaslighters Use:
- You’re crazy – that never happened.
- You’re so sensitive.
- You’re overreacting.
- You must be confused again.
- That’s not right; you’re remembering things wrong.
- Just calm down.
- I never said that.
- What are you talking about?”
- You’re being dramatic.
- You’re overreacting.
- Stop blowing it out of proportion.
- There’s no love in your voice.
- That’s what you heard, not what I said.”
Gaslighting Phrases By Tracy Malone
“Gaslighting: An emotional abuse to burn your sanity.”
“Gaslighting is a distorted alternate reality.” – Tracy Malone
“Gaslighting is an attempt to change the truth.” – Tracy Malone
“Gaslighting is a slow unconscious loss of reality.” – Tracy Malone
“Gaslighting is implanted narratives cloaked in secrecy.” – Tracy Malone
“Gaslighting are lies with a purpose to confuse and control.” – Tracy Malone
“Gaslighting is mind control to make victims doubt their reality.” – Tracy Malone
“Gaslighting is confusing because they switch to intermittent concern.” – Tracy Malone
“Gaslighting is when you don’t remember things the same as they do.” – Tracy Malone
Quotes About Gaslighting
“Gaslighting of the soul: They do everything to dim your light, and then they ask you why you’re not shining.”
“Gaslighting, when their words never seem to match up with their actions, yet their reasons leave you feeling like you’re going crazy.”
“People don’t want to hear this, but words not matching actions is called a manipulation. And refusing to be held accountable for it is gaslighting.”
“Gas-lighters minimize your feelings to gain power over you. They say things like: “Why are you so sensitive?” “Calm down. You are overreacting.”
“Gaslighting: A subtle form of emotional manipulation that often results in the recipient doubting their perception of reality and their sanity.”
“Gaslighting: An abuse used to instill chronic doubt and condition the victim to question their own memory, perception of events, and sense of reality.”
“100% of people who tell you you’re too sensitive are saying it because they don’t want to be held responsible for your reaction when they mistreat you.”
“Your abuser hides your belongings from you, fooling you to question your memory and think that your memory is faulty and weak. That’s Gaslighting.”
“Quitters always believe the lies they tell themselves because delusion is easier to live with than the reality that they settled for an easier path.” – Shannon L. Alder
“Gas-lighters confuse, intimidate, and disempower people… for the purpose of controlling other people, and promoting the abuser’s interests.” – Linda Hatch, PhD
“One of the first steps in freeing yourself from a gaslighting relationship is to acknowledge how unpleasant and hurtful you find this emotional apocalypse.” – Robin Stern
“Whenever someone is not seeing, accepting, owning and expressing their actual personal truth, it will automatically become a gaslighting situation.” – Teal Swan
Gaslighting Quotes For The Narcissist In The Relationship
“People don’t wanna hear this, but words not matching actions is called a manipulation. And refusing to be held accountable for it is called gaslighting. Honey, we’re talking abuse.”
“Emotional abuse is designed to undermine others’ sense of self. It is deliberate humiliation, with the intent to seize control of how others feel about themselves.” – Lorraine Nilon
“You are having a conversation with someone. They leave. And now you are absolutely confused and doubt your memories and perception of reality. That person just Gaslighted you.”
“People who harm you will blame you for it. Remember, an abuser will generally always play the victim, spin a story, tell everyone and they generally call you crazy.” – Maranda Pleasant
“It also makes them vulnerable to more gaslighting, because their defenses have weakened, and the best gaslighting victims are those who doubt themselves.” – Jackson MacKenzie
“Let’s say you have now planned to corner your gas-lighter and question them. They will shower love to fool you yet again. “You know how much I love you. I would never hurt you on purpose.”
“Someone who gaslights you is trying to talk you out of your experience to alleviate their shame and responsibility to an issue. It’s a tool to control and manipulate you.” – Dr. Henry Cloud
“Invalidation is crazy-making, and it is also at the root of gaslighting, where victim’s feelings are purposely denied or manipulated in order to make them question their sanity.” – Smantha Rodman
“Gas-lighters spread rumours about you and can even tell you that others also think that about you. Unfortunately, an extremely effective tactic that will make you feel that something is wrong with you.”
“Gaslighting. That’s what it’s called. The most awful form of emotional abuse. Thabile Ngwato’s reply to someone who said that the most dangerous people are the ones who hurt then act like you hurt them.”
“Stay away from people who always consider you expressing how you feel as you are arguing or being extra. It’s called gaslighting. Toxic people do that so they don’t have to take accountability for their own behavior.”
“Gas-lighters want to be in control and throw responsibility onto their partner while tearing them down. This tactic is proven every time a partner unknowingly tries harder or attempts to prove the gas-lighter wrong.”
Narcissist Gaslighting Quotes
“Gaslighting is the systematic attempt by one person to erode another person’s reality by telling them that what they are experiencing isn’t so – and, the gradual giving up on the part of the other person.” – Dr. Robin Stern
“Emotional abuse can leave a victim feeling like a shell of a person, separated from the true essence of who they naturally are. It also leads to a victim feeling tormented and tortured by their own emotions.” – Lorraine Nilon
“Gaslighting qualifies as a form of emotional abuse that involves denying a person’s experience and making statements, such as “that never happened,” “you’re too sensitive,” or “this isn’t that big a deal.” – Ramani Durva
“Your mental illness is used against you. A diagnosis of mental illness is easily used as a platform for blame. When your mental illness is at fault for every problem that arises in your relationship, you could be a victim of gaslighting.”
“Gas-lighters are habitual liars. They lie to your face and never change their story even if you have proof. They’ll say “You’re crazy. That never happened”. They can be so convincing that you may actually start believing you’re crazy.”
“Secrecy Requirement: gaslighting can only work if the victim is manipulated into a covenant of secrecy. Such is implemented when the victim is convinced that the outside world, or formerly trusted people, have a vested interest in hurting them.” – Ross Rosenberg
“Let us not get scooped up by gaslighting manipulators stealing our emotions and taking possession of our inner child to carry out their dark agenda. Let the light of our intuition guide us subtly and wisely along the path of trust and suspicion. (“Juicy rumors”)” – Erik Pevernagie
“Gaslighting: A form of psychological abuse involving the manipulation of situations or events that cause a person to be confused or to doubt his perceptions and memories. Gaslighting causes victims to constantly second-guess themselves and wonder if they’re losing their minds.”
“Gaslighting their partners into believing the abuse isn’t real by denying, minimizing or rationalizing the abuse. This includes deflecting any conversations about accountability using circular conversations and word salad in order to avoid being held accountable for their actions.” – Shahida Arabi
What is the Impact of Gaslighting on One’s Thought?
- Feeling confused = second-guessing our memories.
- Trying best to earn back the loving side of the person.
- It becomes increasingly difficult to make decisions. Constantly apologizing for our behavior.
- Staying silent or lying to avoid a reaction.
“Remember, someone that does something bad to you, will always try to control the narrative, and they generally get out there first and spin the story to anyone who will listen. I always like to watch the quiet one. You are not alone.” – Maranda Pleasant, Origin: Music, Art, Yoga Consciousness
“Gaslighting is a manipulation tool used by many to gain control over you, and get you to believe what they want you to believe while they abuse you and enjoy their power. Victims can start to have self-esteem issues, self-doubt, feeling inadequate, stupid, unworthy, confused and a need to please everyone.”
“Over time gaslighting creates the effects of confusion, brain fog, self-doubt, disorientation, paranoia, fear, terror, feeling like you’re losing your mind, difficulty making judgements or decisions, second-guessing your memory, feeling like you aren’t good enough, and it can even cause nervous breakdowns.”
“Don’t fight hate with hate” is an example of subtle gaslighting. Where our legitimate hurt and anger at the injustices we suffer is being equated to the bigotry and abuse of our oppressors. Being angry doesn’t mean you are being hateful, it means you love yourself enough to get upset at your own mistreatment.”
“Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation and emotional abuse. The Gas-lighter avoids responsibility for their toxic behavior by lying and denying and making you question facts, your memory, and your feelings. Basically, the Gas-lighter makes you feel crazy and confused.” – Karen Salmansohn
“In terms of gaslighting, I define it as “to implant false and/or distorted narratives that are specially designed or formulated to manipulate a person into a destructive web of deception, loss of control, and the surrender of personal freedom and beliefs of self-worth, self-value, self-esteem, and productivity.” – Ross Rosenberg
“Most people are good and occasionally do something they know is bad. Some people are bad and struggle every day to keep it under control. Others are corrupt to the core and don’t give a damn, as long as they don’t get caught. But evil is a completely different creature, evil is bad that believes it’s good.” – Karen Marie Moning
“Gaslighting is a form of manipulation that seeks to sow seeds of doubt in a targeted individual or members of a group, hoping to make targets question their own memory, perception, and sanity. Using persistent denial, misdirection, contradiction, and lying, it attempts to destabilize the target and delegitimize the target’s belief.”
“Gaslighting, brainwashing, cults, hostage situations, and totalitarian propaganda have a common basis. They use similar techniques to confuse, intimidate, and disempower people. These methods are used by abusers of all kinds for the purpose of controlling other people, and promoting the abusers’ interests.” – Linda Hatch, PhD
“Gaslighting: These predators prey on susceptible individuals who believe in their false altruism, affection and promises of protection. Gas-lighters are most successful when they believably cast themselves as loyal and dutiful protectorates who are unconditionally invested in defending and caring for their beloved gaslit victims.” – Ross Rosenberg
“This term is used in the 1944 Ingrid Bergman film Gaslight, in which a husband purposefully drives his wife insane by flickering lights, making noises in the attic, and then claiming the very real experience was all in her head.” – Samantha Rodman, How to Talk to Your Kids about Your Divorce: Healthy, Effective Communication Techniques for Your Changing Family
“People who gaslight typically use the following techniques: They tell blatant lies; They deny they ever said something, even though you have proof; They use what is near and dear to you as ammunition; They wear you down over time; Their actions do not match their words; They throw in positive reinforcement to confuse you; They know confusion weakens people.”
“Gaslighting, at its core, is a form of emotional abuse that slowly eats away at your ability to make judgments. Essentially, a Gas-lighter spins their negative, harmful or destructive words and actions in their favor, deflecting the blame for their abusive deeds and pointing the finger at you. This is often done by making you feel “overly sensitive,” “paranoid,” “mentally unstable,” “silly,” “unhinged,” and many other sensations which cause you to doubt yourself.” – Aletheia Luna
More Gaslighting Phrases & Sayings
“Playing the victim role: Manipulator portrays him- or herself as a victim of circumstance or of someone else’s behavior in order to gain pity, sympathy or evoke compassion and thereby get something from another. Caring and conscientious people cannot stand to see anyone suffering and the manipulator often finds it easy to play on sympathy to get cooperation.” – George K. Simon Jr.
“It is not okay for someone you like to treat you poorly and then pretend it didn’t happen, making you question your own grasp of reality. This dynamic is called gaslighting. It’s a common tactic of abusers to shift the focus of the blame from their bad behavior onto the person they are victimizing… You may start to internalize the idea that there is something wrong with you and that you did something to provoke the situation as you’re increasingly beaten down and confused.” – Shannon Weber
“One of the first steps in freeing yourself from a gaslighting relationship, then, is to acknowledge how unpleasant and hurtful you find this Emotional Apocalypse. If you hate being yelled at, you have the right to insist that yelling not be a part of your disagreements. Maybe some other woman wouldn’t mind the loud voice, but you do. If that makes you sensitive, so be it. You have the right to set limits where you want them, not where some mythical other, “less sensitive” woman wants them.” – Robin Stern
“One can only return to the fact that even the most ordinary, good-hearted, intelligent people are literally prone to believing the most blatantly nonsensical untruths. And this comes from the realization that there are some opinions and some beliefs so incredibly inane, we may actually on occasion feel insane for not believing them; and that is probably because in giving the benefit of the doubt we self-doubt, we convince ourselves into lame passivity and blind acceptance, we tell ourselves, ‘Maybe I’m just missing something here.” – Criss Jami, Healology
“The purpose of gaslighting is to manipulate you into doubting yourself. Doubting yourself quiets that inner voice that tells you something is off. Doubting yourself makes you feel like you are imagining the things that you are indeed noticing. Doubting yourself makes you mistrust your judgment. Doubting yourself makes me indecisive. Gaslighting is a form of covert abuse designed to keep you in a fog and slowly strip away your self-esteem. In doing this, the toxic person can maintain control by presenting themselves as the sane person who needs to make the decisions because you are incapable.”
“Gaslighting can be subtle and unintentional, but as feminist writer Nora Samaran explains, it is particularly insidious because it undermines people’s trust in their own capacities:
“If you think of the power, the strength, the capacity to effect change that women who trust themselves are capable of, what we are losing when we doubt ourselves is an indomitable force for social change that is significant and therefore, to some, frightening. In other words, our capacity to know ourselves is immensely powerful.” All forms of oppression seem to have this tendency: racism, heteropatriarchy, ableism, ageism, colonization, and other systems of oppression contort people’s insights, experiences, and differences into weaknesses or deny them outright. For this reason, the emergence of trust can be a powerful weapon, which is being recovered all the time through struggle.” – Carla Bergman, Joyful Militancy: Building Thriving Resistance in Toxic Times
“Your narcissistic abuser withholds information in a conversation and replaces it with false information. That’s Gaslighting.”
“The purpose of Gaslighting is to control people and exert power over others, usually practiced by toxic narcissistic personalities.”
“Your narcissistic abuser flaunts about how superior their memory is compared to yours, instilling doubt about yourself in your mind. That’s Gaslighting.”
Gaslighting Quotes & Phrases
“Gaslighting is a form of insidious and covert manipulation where a bully, narcissist, or an abuser targets the victim by making them question their judgments, memory, mind, and reality.”
“Narcissists love to wound and then soothe in a frustrating cycle. This technique of sometimes being cruel and sometimes being loving and kind creates extreme confusion – a confusion that psychologists call cognitive dissonance. The brain can’t handle the two opposite realities side by side, and it causes stress and trauma in the narcissist’s prey.”
“Victims of narcissistic abuse often appear uncertain of themselves, constantly seeking clarification that they haven’t made a mistake or misheard something. Confidence may be so low that they have trouble making simple decisions. They will not be aware that this is caused by an abusive technique called ‘gaslighting’. Victims may be indecisive.”
“Narcissists are consumed with maintaining a shallow false self to others. They’re emotionally crippled souls that are addicted to attention. Because of this, they use a multitude of games, in order to receive adoration. Sadly, they are the most ungodly of God’s creations because they don’t show remorse for their actions, take steps to make amends, or have empathy for others. They are morally bankrupt.” – Shannon L. Alder
“Malicious Narcissists Convincing Other You Are at Fault or Crazy. Another dark ploy is that narcissists contact your relatives, in-laws, friends, and anyone who will listen to broadcast blatant lies about your character. This doesn’t happen in all instances but it is remarkable the lengths these malicious individuals exceed to trash you, put you at fault, and lead others to believe that you are “crazy;” you need immediate psychiatric help, you have always been unstable, etc.” – Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D., Clinical Expert on the Narcissist Personality
“Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse used by narcissists in order to instill in their victims an extreme sense of anxiety and confusion, to the point where they no longer trust their own memory, perception, or judgment.
“The techniques used in “Gaslighting” by the narcissist are similar to those used in brainwashing, interrogation, and torture that have been used in psychological warfare by intelligence operatives, law enforcement, and other forces for decades. The intention is to, in a systematic way, target the victim’s mental equilibrium, self-confidence, and self-esteem so that they are no longer able to function in an independent way, giving the narcissist full control over the victim.”
“In terms of gaslighting, I define it as “to implant false and/or distorted narratives that are specially designed or formulated to manipulate a person into a destructive web of deception, loss of control, and the surrender of personal freedom and beliefs of self-worth, self-value, self-esteem, and productivity.”–Ross Rosenberg
“Gaslighting is the systematic attempt by one person to erode another person’s reality by telling them that what they are experiencing isn’t so – and, the gradual giving up on the part of the other person.”–Dr. Robin Stern
Have you been the victim of Gaslighting Relationship?
Living with a toxic partner can be like walking on eggshells. They are great at playing mind games and can blame the victim for their own false actions. I hope this article helped you know about the signs of a narcissist. Do share it with your friends to help them recognize such people. Stay tuned for more.