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Where are Your Insecurities Coming From?

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Insecurity is a common feeling that nearly everyone experiences at some point, and it can come from a variety of things. However, it usually manifests as a lack of confidence, anxiety, and uncertainty. By accurately identifying and treating insecurity, people can minimize its adverse effects and find new strength, stability, and values ​​to move toward better well-being.

What is insecurity? 

The American Psychological Association reports that insecurity comes in numerous forms. It is a general feeling of uncertainty or anxiety about your worth, abilities, skills, and self-esteem, and about being in danger from something or someone. The negative effects of anxiety can be physical, mental, or emotional. Without security, you can’t accomplish full trust or function to your fullest potential.

What Does insecurity look like?

  • Overwhelming inferiority complex
  • Lack of self-confidence and self-esteem
  • Inability to deal with the stressor
  • General uncertainty about the world
  • Anxiety about relationships with others.

Also Read: 7 Ways To Overcome Your Insecurities

Types of insecurity

Insecurity are of different types and spread to many areas of your life. One person’s insecurity can be very distinct from others’ due to different causes and effects. Not all forms fit neatly into the categories, but the most common types of insecurity include relationship insecurity, social insecurity, and body image insecurity.

1. Relationship Insecurity

With relationship insecurity, people don’t want to be vulnerable or willing to trust others. As a result, you may not be able to continue with them. These issues affect not only the individual but also the people with whom they are trying to establish a relationship.

2. Social insecurity

Social insecurity is often accompanied by a lack of confidence in one’s ability to do well and be successful in social settings. Like other forms, social insecurity is caused primarily by fear of what will happen in the future rather than what has happened in the past. Social insecurity often overlaps with the signs and symptoms of social anxiety.

People with social anxiety may worry about:

  • They look weird
  • Hurt someone or say something inappropriate unknowingly
  • Not smart enough to contribute to a conversation
  • Not understanding jokes

3. Body image insecurity

People with body image insecurity find it difficult to perceive their appearance accurately. They can spend too much time and energy worrying about their appearance instead of having a balanced view of their own features. Specific anxiety may be generalized or concentrated in a single part of the body, such as the nose, ears, knees, or teeth. Some people feel insecure based on the evaluations of others, while others judge themselves more harshly than anyone ever could.

Where does it stem from?

Life experiences can affect a person’s level of anxiety. It may also have a biological relationship with anxiety, a genetic trait that is passed down from generation to generation and is expressed in temperament and character. Though no one can fully explain the reason behind insecurities, experts recognize a link to certain causes.

Also Read: Body Insecurities And How it Affects Sex Lives

Possible causes of insecurity include:

  • Lack of family emotional support: People who have loving and supportive family members are less likely to deal with insecurity.
  • Lack of emotional intelligence: People with low emotional intelligence cannot accurately monitor their own emotions and those of others, leading to unhealthy relationships and a lack of trust.
  • Lack of openness: When people are not open, curious, and comfortable with new people and situations, they note more stress and fear, which leads to less security.
  • Lack of agreeableness: Disagreeable People are unhelpful, uncooperative, or empathetic, and are more prone to interpersonal conflict. These qualities make them feel insecure in social situations.

Two factors directly related to anxiety are addiction and neurosis. As people become dependent on others and relationships, insecurity grows when they feel the risk of the relationship ending. Those who are more neurotic report anxiety, sadness, guilt, insecurity, and many other traits that negatively affect their security.

Anxiety can also come from:

  • poor school results
  • drastic life experience
  • abusive or neglectful relationship
  • chronic medical problems such as cancer or pain
  • mental health condition

Mental health problems such as anxiety and depression have a bidirectional relationship with anxiety. In addition, personality disorders such as borderline personality disorder and narcissistic personality disorder are also associated with anxiety.

How can you deal with your insecurity?

Like other psychological conditions, insecurity can be treated with a combination of treatment and lifestyle changes. However, all treatments require time and patience, so people must be prepared to maintain the intervention in the long term to obtain lasting results.

Here are some good ways to control insecurity:

Recognize the role of insecurity in daily life.

Insecurity can make the problem seem temporary or not have a big impact on your life. While these views may be true, it’s valuable to take an honest look at your life and ask yourself how your insecurity affects your school, work, confidence, communication, self-esteem, and mental health.

A comprehensive evaluation of the cause of insecurity.

When people feel insecure, they may feel that outside problems, situations, and people are causing problems. External forces certainly play a role in insecurity, but it is up to the individual to deal with the problem. If your insecurity is exacerbated by past life experiences, mental health issues, or current relationships, plan interventions that address the cause.

Communicate insecurity concerns openly

Insecurity makes people feel less secure in their relationships and less comfortable sharing their experiences and feelings with others, but this approach only breeds isolation and shame. Instead, take the opposite approach and talk openly with your partner about what you can put up with and what can help. Try to keep your expectations realistic. Share your concerns with loved ones, mental health care providers, and physical health care providers.

Focus on the positive

Talking to yourself positively and the way you see the world has a huge impact on insecurity. Those who speak to themselves in a more positive way, challenge negative monologues, stay focused on the future, and see good in the world around them tend to feel more secure and comfortable.

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