Life is too short to be outlived; it’s the present we shall embrace and the past that we shall let go of.
We are humans and bound to commit flaws, but it’s the act of forgiving that defines your humane maturity; breakups often engage in blaming the other and the unwillingness to take responsibility for one’s mistakes.
Instead of being concentrated in the past, blaming your partner for his/her flaws will not lead to a healthy bond in the long run; in fact, it’s the present that we have to bring the spotlight on.
Morning lazziness is bringing to you a conversation with Marie Murphy Ph.D. about rebuilding chaotic relationships and advice to heal from breakups.
“Chaotic breakups are demanding to be rebuilt, but if both the parties are willing to evaluate their commitments in a relationship and focus on rebuilding their understanding, it will turn out to be fruitful.” says Marie Murphy
Marie Murphy is a relationship coach with a Ph.D. in the sociology of sexuality; she provides counseling services to resolve relationship conflicts. Her career aside, she happens to be a doggie parent, devoted meditator, and practices that she believes have made her life much better.
She started sexual education from high school onwards as a peer sexual educator and volunteered as an HIV/AIDS prevention Street outreach worker.
Having developed a great interest in this field from the time she was young, she decided to pursue the same on her career path.
At times when you learn about your partner’s betrayal in the midst of intense emotion, you would feel like throwing things at them, throwing their belongings out the window, screaming at them for making you feel so horrible, and sue them with divorce papers immediately.
“I have seen amazing results when people learn to take responsibilities for themselves as individuals because then they can come back to their relationship with tools for self-regulation and learn to engage in the relationship in a way that they are not blaming their partner for their flaws and that changes the dynamic incredibly” states Marie on her experience of individual counseling services.
It’s quite natural since different people have their unique character and personality to deal with, and considering the history of the relationship they had shared with their partner also depends upon their reaction.
If you are willing to extend a second chance to your partner, meeting a relationship coach would be an ideal option to help you in that process of healing.
Couple counseling, as well as individual counseling services, are available; choose the one ideal for you.