Love, Life, and Likes
Do the type of pictures you decide to post on Instagram say a lot about your romantic relationship? Ever wondered why some couples share their every then and now on Instagram, while some couples are happy with posting selfies. “At the end of the day, no two relationships are equal. You need to communicate with your partner regarding social media parameters that work for you best”, says Tiffany Allen, Founder of Survivor Match.
In today’s time, “Instagram official” is the new way to declare your relationship status. It plays a notable role in every stage of romance, from formation to breaking up.
“Healthy relationships are often reflected on social media. When you are in a secure, healthy relationship, your Instagram feed will show that your life has balance. You will showcase your own interests and activities, independent of your partner, as well as pictures that include your partner”, says Amber Artis, CEO of Select Date Society.
Ahead, experts reveal what your Instagram posts might say about your relationship.
What role does Instagram play in the relationship?
“Studies have shown that Instagram posts tend towards the too good to be true type of posting and thus are delivering to its user’s unreality about having good relationships”, says Sharon Gilchrest O’Neill, Marriage & Family Psychotherapist/Author.
To be fair, Instagram is changing the graph of relationships. “The best relationships are a continuing work in progress, and putting it all out there for others is not helpful. Perfectly curated lives online provide unreal expectations and lower one’s own relationship satisfaction, and can increase the questioning of what one’s relationship is missing and that maybe it cannot be fixed.”
What do you believe, Love at first sight? Or, Love at first like?
According to a poll recently conducted by Branded Research
- 83.4% of people say that Instagram plays no role in their romantic relationship.
- 6.2% of total consumers say they use Instagram to connect and share with their partners.
- 6.6% of the generation say they share photos and updates about their relationships with others on Instagram.
Types of Instagram couples:
The adventurous, outdoorsy type, Netflix & Chill, or do you fall into the restaurant connoisseur category?
“For instance, if you and your partner can spend hours on the couch binging your favorite show, you are probably placing a high value on intimacy. Even after a year of quarantining, you do not mind spending time together in close spaces,” says Tiffany.
The one who just posts selfies
“Don’t get me wrong – there is nothing wrong with taking the occasional selfie. Do it. However, if you always crop your partner out of the frame, it shows there is some kind of issue. Perhaps you are embarrassed by them? It is clear your relationship isn’t the priority. You want attention, and in the long run, that might create problems in the relationship if one of the partners is constantly seeking it,” says Katie Lasson, a sexologist for Peaches and Screams.
“Moreover, it says a lot about your confidence and level of happiness. For example, a person who can’t (they simply refuse) post any photos unless they have been edited to perfection (or they look perfect in them) is probably not very pleased with themselves or their relationship. It shows you are trying to convince yourself that the mutual relationship between you and your partner is good. Of course, in reality, it might be less than perfect. However, the perfect photos are a way of escaping these problems.”
You post every now and then of your Relationship on Instagram
This is a sign of a happy and comfortable relationship, where the couples are posting every then and now, be it about work, cooking together, and exercising together.
“Such posting behavior shows that the couples have learned how to take care of their relationship, and are more likely to have been in therapy and recognize that this works as an antidote for them to maintain a happier life,” says Sharon.
“It’s really good that both partners are on the same page of the relationship and upfront -when it comes to sharing every then and now on Instagram. Also, assure each other that they will never say/put anything bad/wrong that disturb each other’s privacy.”
You vent about your relationship
Whether it’s out of frustration or humor, taking your relationship grievances on social media is never a good idea, and it destroys your and your partner’s privacy.
“It may convey a variety of meanings: you are so angry, and venting online helps you in the immediate time frame to feel better — you are hoping that your partner will feel differently about the fight/the arguing/the opposite opinions, etc. after seeing the theme in print — or maybe it’s just one piece of many negative behaviors that are occurring in a relationship which is in trouble,” says Sharon O’Neill, Marriage & Family Psychotherapist/Author.
You rarely post about your relationship (once in a blue moon)
You don’t use social media often; that’s understandable, but what if you love to post regularly on social media and only a handful of pictures of yours with your significant other? “It can mean a few things,” according to Sharon.
“Maybe it’s a part of your relationship agreement, not to post many pictures with each other that needs to be acceptable – an important boundary to maintain. Maybe you are embarrassed by your partner and just don’t want them to participate or be involved with your friends and family. Or maybe your last relationship didn’t work well because it was filled with angst and drama by having too much online.”
You Frequently Post Love Letters to Your Partner
“Insecure partners may over-share about their relationships on Instagram. They may post private text messages that read like private love letters. Posting such personal information for the world to see is a big red flag for your partner. When you don’t respect their privacy, they will be distrusting and uncomfortable sharing intimate moments with you,” says Amber Artis.
You non-stop share sweet lovey-dovey pictures
You love your partner; the entire world knows. Still, you feel the need to share gushy-mushy pictures every time you open your Instagram, and that can seem completely insincere.
“When your Instagram feed is consumed by overly lovey-dovey pictures of you and your partner, it may signal that this is a new relationship. We all have that one friend who jumps hard and fast into one relationship after another. Their Instagram feed is full of happy photos as they are falling in love with someone new, only to be quickly followed by memes about breaking up and starting over, followed by another cycle (only this time with a new partner!) When this is the case, your audience is thinking, “Here we go again!” and “I wonder how long this will last?” says Amber.
You like to post on Instagram, but don’t like to post pictures with your partner
“Your feed may not include any photos with your partner, which may be a sign that you are uncertain if your current relationship is “the one.” You may have a fear of sharing your love with the world, afraid that it may not work out in the long run,” says Amber.
“Many individuals are immensely private people and hold what is important to them close, feeling like it’s not meant to be shared publicly. This may create insecurity in your partner if he or she is longing for you to make the relationship “Instagram official.”
If your partner is overly concerned about your willingness to share your love on social media, they may have an insecure attachment style. Their insecurity may have less to do with your actions and more to do with their own insecurities around romantic relationships.”
Most of the time, it is the insecure partner who asks their partner to tag them in their posts to show the world that they are the most important person to them.
From the above expert’s tips, we can only say that don’t mix your relationship with any social media. We understand social media addiction and its highly influencing today’s generations relationships. So, take some time off from this reeling world and spend the time with your dear ones in your real life.